Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Give Me That Nirvana Again

When was the last time you've felt that complete sensation of nirvana as you lose yourself by the beauty of the world? To be perfectly honest, that was how I felt for some moments in our Fine Arts Seattle Tour. Not only did I feel on top of the world, but I felt a lot more important too; especially given the fact that when we performed, Troylairs got a triple-superior rating.












All of our hard work this year has paid off... and we even got invited to sing in Carnegie Hall and an invitation to sing backup for the Nashville Tribute Band! (Definitely auditioning for that in the end of May) Hopefully we'll have a Chamber Retreat this Summer and maybe even a movie night at Mr. Rasmussen's house!

I felt sensational. On top of the world... but going back to school dragged me back down to the bottom of the bucket of my social life. Sure, I still feel needed but I feel that I need to get out of my current situation.

I feel that I am in a very dark place in my life right now.

Turning to the scriptures and my For Strength of Youth pamphlet, I've realized that even though I've put my standards super high, I've disregarded them when it comes to letting people go. Now, I know the answer is clear but it's just executing it that I don't feel comfortable with. I guess it's just a matter of realizing that God will be with me as long as I'm in the right.


After all, recognizing your individual worth can do amazing things for you.

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

You're Making Me Live.

Every single day I feel just a little bit closer to them. Through listening to all of their trials, experiences, and stories I feel just a little bit stronger. Without the experience that they have given me, where would I be today?

Friendships.

Oh, all those little "hi's" and "hello's" in the halls to the "you look beautiful today's" wherever I go. Friendship is not only acknowledgement, but it's also harmony and acceptance. I've got to admit, I love every single one of my friends. Without them, I wouldn't be who I am today.


That being said, I think surrounding yourself with the right friends determines who you, ultimately, will become. I'm not saying that we all succumb to peer pressure or anything, but we do tend to act like the people we hang out with. Surrounding yourself with positive energy, amongst all trials, is the best thing you can do. However, I try to live by the way of "reaching up."

In the past, I've been known to reach down and save the people that I feel need my help. Though being selfless is considered a good attribute, we shouldn't be so careless as to put ourselves at risk just to lift up others in our lives. After all, helping people is a two-way street. That person needs to want to be helped.

Though friendships are very very important, there is a time to drop them and a time to pick them back up again. If you're unhappy in a friendship, get out. Friendship should be filled with regard for one another and fondness.

With friendship in mind, I challenge you all to write down all the friends you're grateful for and what they've taught you.

Friday, April 3, 2015

In My Place

I'd like to think that I finally found where I belong, where I'm happiest, and who will stand by me throughout every storm. To be perfectly honest, that person for me is my brother. I mean... let's think about this. It's not like he's ever going to disown me or anything. Heck, he even holds the priesthood. He's there to protect me, love me, and hang out with me whenever I need him.

Jordan is the most loving person that I've ever met. No matter what kind of person he runs into, he makes them feel included and important. For that, he is my hero. I try my best to be accepting of those around me too because of the way he has inspired me.

Recently, I had been very very sick. I was so scared that I wasn't going to get better that I finally resorted to asking Jordan to pray for me, though I had already been praying for myself. He reciprocated by telling me that he was going to go to the temple to put me in the prayer roll. 

I'll let you guys read his e-mail, because he tells the story much better than I ever could.

"My sister was a little sick this week. Having received the text for her asking for help, I determined it would be a very good plan to put her name on the temple prayer role. When I arrived at the temple that afternoon, I had forgotten why I was there and went to the baptistery. I needed up confirming group after group of people in the packed little confirmation room. After 4 hours of of confirmations, a name that rang familiar came by, the name: Charlene Rebecca Phillips. This came as a wonderful reminder and surprise to me! My little sisters name literally came before my eyes and reminded me to do what I had set out to. We finished the group and I went to put her name in the prayer role. The impression came, "There is yet more I can do to serve my sister."I went to pick up my best friend Ned and asked him if he would accompany me to my mothers home to give my little sister a blessing. As a result, our family had been inspired to attend the temple that Wednesday.
I've been working to help my mother to become more active in the church. The results of many prayers on the mission came to fruition this morning when we, my sister, mother and myself, all went to do baptism at the temple together for the first time... Ever.
Turning to me before we entered our respective dressing rooms, she whispered, " this is the first time since I was a teenager I've done baptisms for the dead!" I won't tell you how young she is now but suffice it to say that she wasn't saying that for nothing.
The experience that we shared there after was to be always remembered. I don't know how the temple workers know but I had the opportunity to confirm and baptize my sister and mother for the dead. I can't explain how grateful I am for that memory. It's one that will be a powerful tool in the utility belt of the Holy Ghost to help me stay on the straight and narrow.
This will turn into a monthly practice in our family. Every first Wednesday will be at the Lords house."

When Jordan and Ned came over to give me that Priesthood Blessing, I felt a lot more loved than I had the rest of that week while I suffered the sickness that failed to leave me. Remarkably, the next day, I woke up and was able to sing, talk, and do many of the things I had been longing to do. I know that this probably isn't the place to talk about the way God loves each and every one of his children.... but it's totally and completely true.

Those of you that are my Non-LDS viewers, we have this thing called General Conference this weekend. Our general authorities talk about what we all can do to become better people and comfort us in letting us know that through Christ's atonement, we can all be saved. I challenge those of you that are interested, to sit down and watch/listen to these meetings. We have four sessions every October and April.