He knows all my concerns and worries, but never at the right time. It seems we're in this loop of conversation in the past. I feel like I'm talking to the Dawson that doesn't really care instead of the one that drops everything when he gets a text from me.
I know that spending time with family and stuff is really important, and I know he's been super busy, but I just wish he still had time for me. I feel like I'm being pushed aside. I dont need to be his #1 priority right now, I just want to feel loved.
Do I feel loved right now? Honestly, I'm terrified just thinking about him. Have any of you felt that sharp pain that makes it hard to swallow, and keeps you up all night just... worrying? He has no idea that I'm so scared right now, but only because he's probably with Gavin
I keep telling myself that it is not a big deal, and that I should just shut up and deal with it because hey, they're blood brothers. They need quality time.
As the tears continue to stream down my face from sheer worry, and the pain gets sharper, I feel my heart slowly breaking as if I know that something bad is happening, or else my self conscious is assuming the worst. I'm so scared. So...delusional? So...Overwhelmed?
...
"Nothing even happened. I'm just lonely." I continue to say to myself. But who knows? I can't even comprehend or put into words my emotions right now. I Miss Him.
Thoughts of him run through my head, all the good times and all the bad times, which stuck out more because of what we've been able to get through. Why now? Why must I question what I already know? I know he loves me, so why do I feel like something's wrong? Is it JUST because I miss him, or is it because he's in trouble? I don't understand.
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