Calling it Quits.

I came home. I couldn't handle the constant stress that my roommates unfortunately provided. I wish that I could say that they were always supportive and loving. Unfortunately, after reporting my roommate for breaking the honor code, my roommates started to completely ignore me. I couldn't handle that stress; especially when it is in addition to the stress I already was feeling from school, family, and wedding planning. 

I fully acknowledge that I did nothing wrong. However, my roommates are still upset for what I did, and I'm not sure that they'll ever forgive me for being a "bully." But that's okay. I'm just excited to be done with my last group of roommates. It's not like roommates are bad or anything, but there's a burden lifted off of your shoulders when you find out you don't need to deal with them a week earlier than you expected.

I love living in my mom's basement. The bed is so comfy and I feel like I can just hide from the world. I know that there's a world out there ready to meet me, but sometimes I just need to lay down and rest from it. I'm just so tired of the stress and worry surrounding me. It's time to get over that and make it a point to focus on what's soon to be my marriage. I can't worry about what other people think anymore, so I had to take myself out of that position.

It's only a week early, but you'd be surprised how much of a change happened. Not only was I feeling less stressed, but I've been able to catch up on so much sleep and concentrate and pace myself so much better on my homework. I'm able to actually sit back and relax. I nearly have everything packed up for married housing!

It's finals week up here at BYU-I. I'm so ready to be done with this semester. I'm so excited to move in with Jared and start our life together. We're already starting to share money, and it's been an incredible blessing to have him by my side. It stresses him out when we spend so much time together because he's got other things he needs to do, but with the wedding so close and stresses surrounding us, I can't help but need him around more.

I'm so glad that I have a place to stay other than A15. My last week there was full of anxiety and I wasn't sure how I was going to get through the rest of the semester living with those people. I needed a feeling of belonging, and even though I can't really get that when I live at my mom's, I am out of the sense like I don't belong.