Thursday, November 20, 2014

First Tri Recap 2014

Finals week! I can't believe how much of a mess this week has been with all of the finals and trying to finish up tests and notes and last-minute assignments. At least it will give people the wake-up-realization that they need to be more organized for next trimester and have much better time management. However, for me, it was still stressful even though I had most of everything done. It was hard because throughout the entire trimester I was trying to balance my school work and my fun.

The bad thing about high school is that just about every teacher at our school likes to think that their class is the only class that you have... EVEN if it's advisory. It's not very convenient when you have made plans and then they get all messed up just because your teachers decide that your education requires pages upon pages of homework. Sure, they give you time in class. But maybe we should spend less time getting lectured on how bad we are, and more time learning about how to do what we need to do.

In English, the score I got on my Final wasn't any better OR any worse from my Pretest score. It makes me pretty disappointed in knowing that I didn't really improve all trimester. However, in Chemistry and Trigonometry I felt like I learned a lot and had a few aha moments in the class as well. Yet, in my History grade, I felt like I didn't learn anything after an entire trimester of sweat and hard work... even though I got an A. As for Chamber Singers, I feel like I improved a ton vocally and was able to express myself in more ways than just singing with everybody. With things such as group games and challenging warm-ups, I feel as if I've become a lot better than I was when it was just Burrows teaching us. Ras has definitely improved our choral program.

Even though for the most part I didn't have any fun classes, I was still able to make the best of each of my days at RHS this trimester. I strengthened and made friendships. Just in one trimester, I've been able to better realize the importance of friendship. Gosh, how is it that I had forgotten how awesome friendship was when I was too busy thinking about me and my own relationship? I feel disappointed in myself looking back on last year and how much I pushed people away from me, when I could have strengthened bonds even more with them while it lasted, instead I let my friends fade away. I couldn't feel any more sorry for the opportunity I lost sight of my Sophomore year.

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Lil Miss Epic's 2 Year Anniversary Post: 20 Months Without My Brother

Life gets tough when you don't have that special someone next to you to depend on all the time, especially when they were the one that you sought approval from and were closest to in your time of need. For me, that special someone is Erik Jordan Phillips, my 21 year old brother. When he read out his mission call, I knew that I would miss him more than anything else but with him out in the field, I've had to face a lot of things out on my own. 

At first I knew it was going to be okay because my boyfriend at the time was able to comfort me and tell me that everything was going to be alright with him gone. As time progressed, I started forgetting about him and dealing with my own teenage activities like hanging out with friends and participating in choir. Every once in a while, I would stumble upon a little piece of him as I went about my daily life. I found items like photos, poems, songs, and even letters that he had written me. Those items gave me a quick little reminder that my hero was out serving the Lord on his LDS mission.

A lot of the letters from my brother happened to be apologies for "not spending enough time with his precious little sister." It humbled my heart in seeing that even he makes mistakes. Of course, it did hurt not being able to hang out with my very-busy-brother, but the apology he gave me made me forgive him and miss him even more than I already did.

It was scary being without him sometimes. There'd be spiders in my room, and I couldn't call for my brother to come smash it dead! But while he was gone on his LDS mission, I realized most of the qualities that I want in my future husband. As I tried to change things with my current boyfriend, things started failing in the relationship and I ended up getting my heart broken. It killed me not being able to talk about it with my big brother, face-to-face. Heck, I didn't even get a letter telling me to 'cheer up' from him. I was heart-broken, not just over getting dumped, but also over the friendships that seemed to be falling through as time went on.

I was depressed and life was darker than ever. I had gone on a couple of dates to try to cheer myself up, but it was then that I realized that I wasn't looking in the right places for what I want. I needed my friends back... but what could I do to get good friends? I started writing my brother again, and he sent me some adorable dating stories. I knew that I had to change so that I was attracting the right energy into my life, and be the right kind of girl for my future man and the right kind of friend to attract good friendships. After all, I did know what I wanted, it was just time to go after it.

Now, I find myself missing him so much with just four months left of his mission. I can't believe he'll be back in March. There's so much I've learned about him, learned from him, and learned without him while he's been gone. The real question is-- Has it been worth it? Absolutely. I wouldn't trade anything for the important life lessons I've learned and the eye-opening experiences I've experienced.

TWO YEARS
A lot can happen in two years.
A lot of fear, a lot of tears.
But what can you do to change?
What is there to rearrange?

Your heart is shattered.
Your brain, scattered.
Look to him in every way.
He will brighten up your day.

Before you know it, two years have passed.
Two years seemed as if they had a lot longer to last.
You could've been broken, but you were full of cheers.
Now I ask you, Would you have changed those years?

-Bek Phillips


HAPPY TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO MY BEAUTIFUL
LIL MISS EPIC BLOG PAGE!

It's been amazing working here on the blog. 
I've learned so much within these past two years.
I wouldn't change a thing if I were given the choice to. 
I love you all, thanks for reading.

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Influential Inspiration

We all have those moments where we sit by ourselves and just want to lay around and cry because of how 'unblessed' we feel, even though we know in the back of our minds that our lives probably couldn't be any better than they are now. But the truth is-- we totally are blessed. Heck, when you think about it, we're way more blessed than we think we are.

How terrible it is of us to sit here and expect love from others when we aren't giving love to them. How do you expect somebody to treat you with respect, when you don't have the decency to treat them the same? How can we expect somebody to accept us for who we are, when we're always judging those around us for who they are? It's questions like these that make us step back and think about what we're doing to build or demolish the lives of the people around us. But why do we ask others and ourselves these seemingly pointless questions if we don't expect change out of ourselves?

Waiting for change to happen is like sitting in a dark room waiting for somebody to flip the switch. Why sit around and wait for it to happen, when you could get up off of your butt and make your life brighter. If you want the change, then make that change. However, if you(like me) have started to make that change and are loving all the blessings you receive because of it, keep at it! You can't expect the blessings to keep coming and coming if you stop working for it. Life isn't going to just do itself for you, you have to do life! If you want somebody to change-- it's their choice. Just know that we still have to be that example, that shining light, for those who we know can do so much better.

Have somebody you know that needs to fix their life and get back on the right track? Be that example for them, fix something that you need to fix, to help motivate and inspire them to fix their life. It really isn't all that hard to inspire those around you. Believe it or not, people younger than you are looking up to you to see what is normal or what they can do to contribute and become more responsible and self-reliant, or just learn from your bad example. Even those older than you may look up at you and tell themselves that they need to be better, or they could just complain about how kids have changed these days. Trust me when I say that your peers and people your own age look at you and think, (whether they realize it or not) "What can I do to be more like them?" or even "Wow, what they're doing is totally not right, I'm glad I'm not them." 

Your thoughts, your actions, even what you say can influence somebody around you so much in what they're doing in their own lives.