November's Resolution

Alrighty then! It's been a while since something actually really interesting and amazing has happened!! I'm going to treat this kind of like a follow-up post to "Why? It's A Long Story..." I'll be referring On&Off to most of my other things referring as to why something may be really important. So pretty much, this post is like a sequel to that of which happened in November of last year.
 

Seriously. DON'T READ THIS IF YOU HAVEN'T READ MY BLOG BEFORE.

Okay, so as I said in my post "Why? It's A Long Story..." I came to a conclusion that I hated three specific people.  As most of you know, one of the people I classified under "hate" was one of my friends, Coleman. He said very cruel words to me, and they offended. I shall not repeat them if you're not interested, but if you are, then go to "Why? It's A Long Story..." Recently, Coleman decided to apologize. He said that he had been thinking about our argument back in November, and realized that it was really dumb, and that we shouldn't have been fighting over a dumb girl. As many of you may know, this girl has been back-stabbing, and lying to pretty much everyone she knows. Coleman told me about his back-story as to why they stopped talking, and of course I felt pretty bad. However, it wasn't her who decided that they shouldn't talk. It was Coleman, who I'm proud of for having standards as high as he does. He basically told her that he wasn't going to take any of her crap, and left her, and now they aren't talking. Way to go, Coleman! I'm accepting his apology not because all must be forgiven, but because I understand the crap he's been through with her, and I understand that it's not his fault for believing a lie, and accusing me of doing something that I hadn't done. He only chose what he believed to be true. Since he liked her a lot, he decided to believe her, and that she was right, which later bit him in the butt. 

Another post I kind of want to reference back to is "People Can Change" To be perfectly honest, I've been thinking about this post, and have been thinking that I'm kind of a hypocrite, because let's face it, a ton of people around are starting to say that Phebe isn't that bad of a person. I'm starting to slowly forgive her, believing, and studying my testimony on that people can, in fact, change, and that anyone and anything can change. Maybe it's time to forgive and forget, because what if she was another victim of the whole Mandi-situation, and stuff just like some of the people in our school, including me.

I'm not sure I have covered this topic before, but if not, then here's something new. Recently, I've been praying and praying, and hoping that something bigger than me, a tool, some form of grace could help my desperate need. I had a prompting...that I needed to help Dawson. I know this may start to sound creepy and stalker-ish, but ever since Erik got his mission call, I feel obligated to somehow get Dawson interested in becoming an active member of the church. Finally after all this praying, the grace has helped me...and now my wish has come true. Dawson really does want to become again, active. I'm so elated with joy in his decision. Today he attempted to get Isaiah to take him to church, but turns out church for them started at 9, so he missed it. I talked to my mom about this, and she basically had us offer him to come and listen to General Conference with us this up-coming week. Of course, being Bek, I'm absolutely thrilled! His mom basically replied with "We'll see..."

Song of the Day: Scream and Shout by Will-I-Am and Brittney Spears

Shout-Out of the Day: 
Coleman: Hey Coleman! I'm glad that we're actually talking again! All is forgiven! We've all been through crap with her, and to be honest, I'm so glad that you've decided to be, once again,  my friend. It's amazing to know that even though we've gone through some pretty deep shiz, we can be friends again. Thank you for standing up for yourself, and also apologizing to me.

The Results...

Alright! I had a party last night and we all celebrated the fact that we auditioned for Troylairs! Mr. Burrows didn't put up the results on Friday, so none of us found out if we got in or not. I invited over Mary, Dawson, Maddie, Jarron, and Krista was the one who couldn't make it to the party.

First, Mary, Maddie, and Dawson arrived and they just watched me play Twilight Princess until Jarron arrived. When Jarron came we were basically just goofing off before we chose our movie. We all decided to watch A Goofy Movie, but Jarron was upset because he wanted to see Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. We stopped the movie as soon as Goofy started to sing about the open road, and we all played Curses.

Turns out, I had to teach everyone how to play! In the end, Dawson and I were the only two people in the game. I ended up winning with only one curse card flipped, and it was because I refused to do it.

After that we played Super Smash Bros, and after being beat up and the first one dead, I actually WON against Dawson! I was so proud of myself!

Dawson told everyone that the results for the audition were up, and I pulled out my mp3 and sat down with everyone around me. It turns out, I made it into Troylairs! Jarron, Krista, and Dawson made it in too! Mary and Maddie didn't make it in, and we were all pretty surprised! Especially for the fact Maddie didn't make it. However, she had an asterisk by her name, and that means she gets to go talk about her audition with Mr. Burrows and see what she could've done better. I'm proud of all of us! Good job!

Song of the day:
100 years by Five for Fighting.

Shout out of the day:
Madi Dunn: I knew you could make it into Troylairs this year! Great job!

No Matter What

Alright. I finally got my Troylairs audition over with! I have to admit that I feel like I can do almost anything after that. There were so many things that I was worried about, but now I realize that none of it matters as long as you just try your best no matter what. Don't let your peers tell you that you can't do it, and even when you're positive you won't get in, you can still say that you tried. No matter what.

At first, yes, I was completely terrified and wasn't confident that I was going to get into Troylairs. Guess what! It doesn't hurt to try. To be perfectly honest, I feel like that was the best that I've ever done! Is it because of my latest discovery? Probably! Anyways, I might as well tell you how this all went down...right?

The last bell had just rang, and it was time for everybody to head home. Me, Mary, Krista, Maddie, Jarron, and a ton of other people had decided to stay after for auditions and to work on the school play. My little group of friends, The O-Fam, decided to practice The Star-Spangled Banner before Mr. Burrows arrived. So, as we all sang, including Jarron, we tried our best, had fun with it, and were just getting out nervous energy about auditioning. Turns out, Burrows was running a bit late. He had arrived as soon as Maddie's audition was about to start. However, there were people who were signed up before her that still needed to audition. Yet, there were still a lot of people that signed up but didn't come at all.

Maddie was really nervous about auditioning, and so we all decided to pray while our friend, Jarron, was auditioning. Nobody else was willing to say the prayer, so I pretty much volunteered. After I had put my heart into the prayer, everyone around me started to compliment me and say that I had a way with prayer, and that it was some sort of gift. After Jarron came back out, they wanted me to pray again because Maddie was still really nervous. That time, I made it especially for her and her confidence.

It was finally time for her to audition. I must say, she did amazingly well, and I'm very impressed with her talent. After she went, it was time for Krista to audition. To be honest, Krista did amazingly well. She didn't sound nervous at all until the second half of The Star-Spangled Banner. Krista tells me that it was only because she saw Mr. Burrows writing down things on her Audition form. Then, it was Mary's turn. Mary, is not the best singer on earth, but she still tried. Because I told her that no matter what, she still tried her best. No matter what, we can all try to be the best that we can be, and the only thing that could keep her from making it into Troylairs is honestly just her confidence level.

After Mary's audition, we all just sat in the hall just waiting for Mr. Burrows to call me out to audition. They all said that they'd be there for me, and I said a silent prayer, as I felt myself getting a slight headache. They all talked about what they did wrong, and how nervous they were. Which of course, made me even more nervous. Then I thought to myself, is it really going to make that much of a difference in my life? How will I feel about this audition after it's over with? I'm probably going to think that it was really no big deal, and not worth stressing over. Finally, we hear Burrows call my name in a deep voice. I stand up, and walk in not feeling as nervous as I thought I would be.

The first part of the audition, he was just testing how high my range was, and how low my range was. I'm lucky that I had Jarron, Krista, and Mary in there with me to give me support and I'm lucky that I treated the audition the way I did. I treated the audition like it was just me and Burrows hanging out, and having fun. Burrows really is one of my best friends. From what I know of him, he's the best teacher that I've ever had personally. He's been there for me, and helped me so much.Suddenly, I was comfortable singing. It felt like I had no problem with the audition at all. This is when I realized that I have finally found my true happy place. The RJH choir room. The rest of that audition went by quicker than I expected. He just played five notes, and I sang back on la. Then, there was the very important part. The highlight of the audition. The Star-Spangled Banner. I was completely fine until the last few sentences. I thought about how I did when he played the five notes, and what I sang back. I started shaking a little bit as I realized that i was actually auditioning, and not just hanging out. I tugged on my shirt, trying to calm down as I see Burrows smiling as he writes down how he thinks that I'm doing. I sing "and the home of the brave" and then I come back to reality as I hear Jarron, Krista, and Mary clapping for me, and Burrows smiling telling me that I did amazingly well.
I walked out of the room, feeling like I was a better person for auditioning, and even if I don't make it into Troylairs, this was still an amazing experience.

Song of the Day: The Star-Spangled Banner

Shout-Out of the Day:
Jarron: Hey Jarron, I just wanted to let you know that I felt like I needed you in there with me as I auditioned. To me, you've really become a true friend, and I want you to know that I respect you. I'm so glad that you're here for me in all that I do, and I hope that you see me the same way.

Don't Take Your Family for Granted

Sorry it's been so long you guys... I guess I wanted to share a little bit of what's been going on lately.

With the new trimester going on, things have been very...different. I have Seminary again, and that's always great. I feel like I need Seminary a lot more right now. Why? My brother's leaving, and I have a feeling that Seminary will pull me closer to the gospel, and with my current class I feel like we can become closer, as if we're a  family.

However, there has been some down-sides to this trimester so far. Dawson and I only have two classes together...math and history, and then I have to go to lunch and he has to go to his next class. It's been hard even though it's only been two days. I always find myself just thinking of all the little things about him. He's got track practice for 5th period and after school ends, so I don't really expect to see him all that often. But something completely made my day yesterday...and I felt like I really needed it.


I felt like I was gonna get carsick on the bus again, so I decided to call my mom. So...as I was pulling out my phone, I see Dawson turning the corner. At first, I thought I was hallucinating, and thought wow I really do miss him if I'm starting to see things. I couldn't stop looking at him, so as my friends walked up to me trying to say hi, I said hey and like walked towards Dawson while putting my phone back. We hugged and then he explained as to how he got there. I was so happy. Nobody has ever done something like that for me...or just to get the chance to see me. I called my mom saying to pick me up at the eye-doctor, and she said yes. For the most part, Dawson and I just sat there together, hand in hand, with his arm around me, and my head on his shoulder. We kissed...and it was amazing. He thought something was wrong, and so he was pretty much trying to comfort me. Truth is, nothing was wrong at that moment. I was just happy to be with him.



This morning, I woke up and thought to myself "Well, this is it.." This is the day that my hero leaves me. I won't see him again until I'm 17. I hugged him good-bye...and he gave me his leather jacket. It means a ton to me, and I'm wearing it as I write this post. Ladies and gentleman, don't take your family for granted. As soon as he got in the car and slowly closed the door, I cried. Think about it. What would you do without your hero in your life? This will definitely be a challenge for me, but I'm determined to survive it. Again, this goes a lot with my blog description...inspiring my inspirations...He's my inspiration, but today he told me that I inspire him...and it means the world to me. I love him so much. He's the best brother a little sister could ever ask for, and I'm looking forward to May two years from now when he returns to me.

Shout-Out of the Day:
The Hyper Peeps: Hey you guys. Now that Erik is gone, I'm going to need your comfort. We, as a group, need to hang out a ton more often. I love you all...and I wish you guys the best in your own daily lives.

Song of the Day:
Big Brother Best Friend Forever by My Little Pony

James! You Can Count on Me.

This post? Oh it's nothing much. It's just to remind my sister site, the daily tower, that he's my best friend and that I love him a fetching ton. James, you can count on me. I promise I'll be there for you. No matter what.
Song of the Day: Count on Me by Bruno Mars
Shoutout of the day: Today is all about James! Like it up for support.

Why Can't We Just Get Along?

Well then! Thought I might update my blog even though nothing major has happened. I guess you guys like to keep-in-touch though, so I'm posting! As of when I'm posting this we have 1429 page views! I can't believe that I've come this far without quitting this blog! I talked to my mother and my brother, and it turns out they had very short-lived blogs. My brother wouldn't tell me how many posts he had, but my mom had one post. My mother quit because she couldn't find the time to update, she forgot about it, and she didn't know how to work it anyways! Erik quit because he didn't know what to write..whether he was to make it a personal blog like a journal, just a re-cap of his day, or even just advice-giving. As you guys can see, my blog is a combination of those three things! I can feel free to post whatever I please! If I don't know what to post on a day-to-day basis, then I'll just answer some fan questions, or even answer questions from the random journal jar. (which so far, has only happened once.)

Everyone has been breaking up lately! I wonder what's going on! I'm still confident about being with Dawson though; I know he wouldn't just drop me like some people have done to their partners. Let me just rant with you a little bit. You can't just go: "I love you I love you I love you I love you so so so much! I love you more than anything!" and then break up with them the next day because you don't like them anymore! That, to me, is being a complete liar. You can't just lead a girl on, and then break up with her because you don't want her heart to be broken even more later on. Can't you guys see? Couples just don't have the faith in each other that they used to. At the beginning of the year, we see couples getting together, and finally being happy. Now, it's the end of Rigby Junior High's second trimester, and everyone is getting sick of each other. What my advice is to the people who would like to break up with someone, but "let them go gently" would be to continue to go out with them, but gradually stop doing the things that keep you closer and fade away. Then, in my opinion, you should be able to break up with them, and not have them feel as much heart break.

It's not just the couples that are getting sick of each other here in Rigby. There's been so many fights at our school. There was 1 big chick fight that started it off, and then there were like 3 fights the next day. One girl that I know, got a restraining order and she was just defending herself from a girl who was picking a fight with her. Here's what I say to all this nonsense: Is it really worth it? Do you really mean every word that you say? Was what he..or she...said to you really that bad? How would you feel if you were in the other person's shoes? That's just something to think about it.

Song of the Day: Better That We Break by Maroon 5

Shout-out of the Day:
Keely: To be honest, you're probably one of the only people keeping me sane. There's so much drama lately, and I just wanted to let you know that you, my friend, are amazing! KEEELY. =D I love you!

Drawkah 5 months

Today is my five month anniversary wiff Dawson. I'm so happy! However, this morning was a disaster. I got up, and I decided to be all relaxed and crap, so I were sweat pants. That's the epic part. Next, I decide let's undo my braids from last night. I undo the back braid and it turns out looking like crap. CRAP I TELL YOU. Anyway, I fluff it up a bit, and then do my makeup. I ended up sliding the applicator straight across my pupil. JOY. PURE FREAKING JOY. It hurt soooooo much.

Anyways, after choir, I had noticed Dawson looked sad. I had assumed it was about his dad, and he had just told me there was something in his eye. I didn't believe him. Taking from the fact we had ended choir with Shenandoah, I had come to the conclusion that he misses his father. I try my hardest to make it so he's happy, and apparently it helped.

I had gotten thinking after hearing near the end of Romeo and Juliet, about my last breakup. To be honest, my biggest fear right now is not being able to get past 5 months of being in a relationship. Thanks to James, I'm a little more calmed about the situation. I don't think Dawson would just stop loving me suddenly... so I should be alright.

Song of the Day: superhero by Cher Lloyd.

Shoutout of the day:
Dawson: iloveyou. Happy 5 months. <3

That Feeling...

Waking up today, I felt different. Like something.. idk what.. was just wrong. It's that same feeling I woke up with when I got dumped. Well, tomorrow we're hitting our 5 month anniversary. If I can make it through the day after that, this'll be my longest relationship. But there's that strange feeling again... Wish me luck.

Trust

This is great. Just AMAZING. Am I gonna regret that he knows my biggest secret? Ehh..probably not because it was something I had done in the past anyways. Sure, I'm Bek..and I can be pretty dang manipulative, but he still manages to love me for who I am anyways! That's what counts, am I right? =) I think I finally trust him..and trusting people for me...is pretty dang hard to do.

Mmkay, yeah. Soo..I've been thinking..and thing is...now that I THINK about it. James and I are like..besties. and we've been besties ever since a lil after the breakup. We've been SOOO much closer! and to be honest, I'm pretty glad we broke up, because now I have someone to talk to that understands me a little more than others do. It's great to have a guyfriend who can understand and tease me. It's great. So, here's to James! (")(^_^)(") RAAWR.

Next order of business!!

DON'T YOU JUST HATE IT WHEN SOME CHICK WON'T GET OVER YOU AND LEAVE YOU ALONE? AND THEN SHE SENDS HER FRIENDS AFTER YOU TO TORMENT YOU AND MAKE IT SO THAT YOU WON'T FORGET HER?! Haha yeah..pretty much. But! Chelsea and I went out and we threw away all of the crap that was related to..her..It was awesome..we said a speech about the item, and then we threw it as far away from us as possible, out into the snow. Pretty dang epic if ya ask me!

 HAVE SOME NEWLY MADE COVER PHOTOS THAT I MADE FOR FACEBOOK!!<3<3

HAVE SOME NEWLY MADE COVER PHOTOS THAT I MADE FOR FACEBOOK!!<3<3

Song of the Day: Count On Me by Bruno Mars

ShoutOut of the Day:
Chelbo: This one's for you! Never give up on those stupid b-words who are tryna get in your way!

Home Alone.

Oh wow...Home alone on a four day weekend. JOY, am i right? PURE FREAKING JOY!! Ahem..to me? NO. My friends are all out doing stuff without me, and I'm stuck at home watching these dumb dogs when I could be out having fun with Mary and Krista at the pizza party while we could've had laugh attacks and died on the floor from laughter. But no. Nothing..sitting here "SUPERVISING." The sad part is, I said I had so much work to do, but I finally finished my comfort zone and concert critique for choir and after that it's been like THERE IS NOTHING TO DO! Other than the fact that I've gotta write journal entries for Romeo & Juliet. I got about 1 entry for Romeo, and one for Juliet, both similar and about the same night. Aka, when they first met. The thing that troubles me most is that I have to write these journal entries in a Shakespearean language! How the fetch?! Another thing about being home alone, you don't realize when you're full, and just eat and eat and eat until you finish watching whatever is on your DVR, and then you end up puking. Not that that happened or anything...well...it did...once...not today, but still!

What I love about being home alone is that you can stay on technology as long as you would like, and have peace and quiet...well...not in my house. It's never quiet...or peaceful..thanks to my dogs! -_- It's pretty darn hard to stay concentrated on the whole Romeo & Juliet journal entry thing, but I think I might stick with a journal entry a day because after all, I've just got four journal entries left, and then I'll type it all up!

Is it weird that I really really really want to just invite over all my friends to come and party at my house while my parents are gone? I'm so lonely that it doesn't even seem like it's a bad idea! I'm so lonely that I don't know what to say to other people who wanna talk to me! I really just want my mom to let me invite over at least one friend that she really trusts to hang out and stuff so I won't sit here in misery while everybody else is out having a good weekend. I was really looking forward to this weekend, but now...not so much. I want it to be over now, even though there's work to be done.

Song of The Day: Break The Sky cover by HopeUndying or Felecia Dygart
This girl has an AMAZING voice..I love her!

Here, you guys get a picture because I'm not doing a shoutout.

Valentine's Day 2013

These past few days have been...the best. I'm not gonna go into detail because it's gonna make single people sadder than they already are. Mmkay... allow me ONE sentence of happiness over what happened. Kissing a bunch with Dawson, and getting chocolate for Valentine's day. Ohh my gosh. Haha. =) amazing.
Song of the day: Collide by Howie day.
Shout-Outs of the Day:
James: Yeah..I lost your dare...sorrry.
Dawson: you're amazing. Haha =)
Chelsea: sorry we nevah danced.

People Can Change

Temptations are powerful, and can overcome your thoughts and feelings. Be sure to stay true to who you are, and hang with the right crowd. Make sure that you both like them and like yourself when you are around them. Little things like these and up shaping who you are. Let's face it, if you're a good girl or a good boy who obeys your parents and follows the rules and your standards, chances are you're on the right path. However, people can change... let's take that same type of person, but fit them into a world of temptations and a bad crowd. There's no doubt about it, you're going to change according to who you are with certain people. It doesn't matter whether it's for good or for bad.

Sometimes people change for the better. Let's say there's this guy..or girl..you've always hated because they're on the wrong path and you don't like the way you are around them, and what you feel. About 2 years from now, that person could have changed from before. Since everyone and everything can change, we've invented what the world calls "second chances." Before you hop right in, and start hanging around this person who has said that they have changed, actually observe them..see if they're really telling the truth. You never know, sometimes people change for the worst. It can take any amount of time for someone to "change."

Another thing that affects change is your attitude. Chances are, if you go through your day with a smile on your face, no matter what your mood is, you're going to attract other great people that are possibly on the right path because of the happiness they feel around you. However, if you go throughout your day complaining, you're going to attract the complete opposite, the wrong crowd.

If you want good friends, and happiness in your life, then I suggest you follow your heart, as I've said before, and make the correct choices according to the situations that occur. Don't just hop into any idea, think about it.

Song of the day: Everything Can Change by Spectacular.

Shout Out of The Day:
Marie: People change... the person you thought was your best friend in elementary school, could be your mortal enemy now. If you were really my friend, you'd know i wouldn't lie on here. Please don't go around saying I'm a bad person when I state my thoughts, opinions, and experiences.

Choir Dinner 2013

This year's choir dinner was the best. Not because of the dinner itself but because of what happened throughout it.
Okay so I decided to have Chelsea and Dawson ride with me up to the highschool directly after school. So we did. No biggie. =)  yeah so we just sit in the car. Whatevs. All of us holding hands. Me in the middle cuz I'm not letting her hold his hand. Yeah. So we get to the high-school and I see James and we say hi and stuff. No big deal even though I hadn't seen him since the christmas concert. So Dawson James Chelsea and I were up in the choir room with James playing talking to the moon by Bruno Mars on the piano, when Chelsea tells him and I to kiss, and so we did and she took a picture. And now there's another pic of us kissing on Dawson's iPod. It was brighter and you could see my face, so I  liked it! Kay so later after we had performed Dawson and I were kinda hot and we wanted to avoid an un-named stalker who kept reappearing so we went outside to walk and talk a bit. On our 3rd time outside, I admit... I was FREEEEZING. But I didn't wanna go back inside. So I suggested to sit down on the bench in front of rhs. we sat there and I put my head on his shoulder and he kind of rested his head on mine, and then put his arm around me. Then I wanted him to do this one trick with his hand where he can hold mine and have his arm around me. We talked about how I felt about James back then, and then I transitioned to how I feel about daws. And then we like talked about if we would rather freeze to death or burn to death. We had those intervals with the conversation where we kissed but we only kissed 4 times. Technically 5, but we said one didn't count because we missed and I got his cheek and he got my chin. Thrilling, huh? Yeah that's when I made a move and was like fine that doesn't count. Here's to make up for it! Then I kissed him.
Recently we've done something we call a double kiss. It's like two consecutive kisses. And it wasn't making out cuz making out to us would be- "ick" we had talked about it before once and had defined the term "making out" as using tongue- a little or a lot, in a kiss... again...ick.
Anyways, Dawson and I decide to head back into the school, and I had a good 20 new messages on my phone full of "where are you?" texts. I come in and everyone either assumes he and I just had sex or we were "making out" (ick) I deny it and tons of people are still worried. Well here's my confirmation guys..I'm not a slut! =) Dawson and I were sitting outside talking about random crap being boyfriend and girlfriend. No big deal. We just wanted some alone time.
Anyways I just went home and watched pitch perfect with Chelsea. It was sooo good.
SONG OF THE DAY:
Teenage Dream by Katy Perry
Dedicating this to Chelsea for making a fort out of sheets.
SHOUT OUT OF THE DAY:
James: Hey! Sorry I disappeared the other night. this whole post says I didn't do what Alex said Dawson and I did. Haha anyways. I need Seek. No joke. For seers. MONDAY.
P.s. Im commandeering Eriks guitar.mwahaha it's MINE now!

Follow Your Heart

Mmkay you guys want me to update this thing. The problem is I don't OWN a computer or laptop so it's kinda hard to update all the time. Anyways. I found out The Daily Tower doesnt hate me, he's just been stressed and super out of it. =P Well at least that's what I got out of it.

Next order of business...crushes...if it's driving you nuts. Ask him or her out already. They're most likely waiting for you to make the first move. I actually heard that guys like it when girls ask them out but in my honest opinion, I think a those guys need to get they're confidence level up on asking that special someone out. If somebody asks you out that disgusts you completely, you still have to let them down easily because we all don't take rejection well. It's hard enough to just say no, but you have to be careful not to shatter the persons confidence. At least it's flattering that they worked up the confidence to ask, right? Something I hate- When people ask me about why I'm going out with Dawson. I swear I mean...I didn't go out with him just because he's cute...I followed my heart and took a chance, and we're both glad I asked him out. No regrets. If you love someone enough it is hard to ask them out because I guess you don't want to take rejection and shatter that little fantasy you had in your mind. If you follow your heart, and let them know you love them and just put it all out there they respect you more, and it is also good to just finally tell them. However, I've discovered that if you wait way too long, you'll either be classified as "in the friend zone" or "stalker." Be careful with all that you do. Once again. Follow your heart.even if they have a boyfriend or a girlfriend it's still important to let them know how you feel.

Song of the day: Makes me wonder by Maroon 5.

Shoutout of the day:
Viewers: follow your heart and let them know how you feel. Risk it because sometimes you only get one chance to let them know. You'll regret it if you never tell them.

Opposite Day. 2013

Today was national opposite day and I gotta admit it was fun. I got to be Dawson pretty much all day and He gotta be me. in my opinion, I don't think He did so well with pretending to be me. However, I probably did horrible too. Anywayys. Chelsea brought her camera to school and then told Dawson and I to kiss, and that she'd take a pic and that we weren't allowed yo stop until she said so. So there I am kissing Dawson, she gets the picture but she keeps saying keep going keep going or whatever and don't get me wrong, kissing Dawson is AMAZING and all but with all these eyes watching it got a little awkward for me. After she said keep going again, I broke from the kiss and told her to shutup. Haha and then she showed a ton of people the picture. To tell you all the truth, HIGHLIGHT of my day. Anyways we kissed goodbye and then I told "bek" I loved "her" and walked to my bus, still going by Daws.
Anyways I'm thinking about possibly throwing a valday party, but my parents aren't so sure I should have one, and I don't really know who to invite. This'll be a bit of a challenge. I don't really want to invite that many people. I might just do kind of a couple thing and just have "drawkah"(Dawson & Rebekah) and "sircus" (Marcus & Sienna) over. After all, I did start planning with HER in the first place. Sorry everybody but I'm already making plans for Valentine's day. Even got my VERY FIRST valentine...ever. <3 this is great.

Song of the day: comatose by skillet
Ohmyheck this song is amazing. I love it so much and I wish I had it here on my mp3. Thanks to Dawson to showing the song to me.

Shoutout of the day:
Keely: where the fetch are you? I can't even wish you a happy birthday you little cloud watcher.

Phases into musical phrases.

I don't know what the deal is. These past few days just seemed completely different. These days  were kinda quiet and depressing for most people and depression for me is not hard to catch whatsoever. It's all just a phase. I wonder what all of our problems are sometimes. I'm starting to look at the "doom and gloom" side of life..and I know what you're thinking..oh great. A pity party. It's just that I haven't gone through this depression like this since 2007. (Rachel's cancer. Parents' divorce.) The only thing that keeps me sane nowadays is..well..music..lyrics..songs..feelings that come to life...melodies...<3

Maroon 5..it's what I obsess over the most. I unleash the inner me, I feel most like me all when I listen to them. Maroon 5 got introduced to me by a guy that my mother was dating. This wonderful man's name was Scott. The only reason my mother didn't marry Scott was because she found out that he was addicted to cigarettes. She packed all of us up, and left even though the two were in love. She wanted the best for us kids. A couple of years later, I got a phone with a full keyboard, and that had already got music on it. That's when I discovered my first ever maroon 5 song...better that we break. It related to my mother's life so well that I decided to find the other songs they wrote. I found she will be loved, won't go home without you, and back at your door... I then fell in love with their music. It is written to amaze, and to relate to. I talked to Scott one day last year, and from what it sounds like,He is still in love with my mother. He's so in love with her that He has COMPLETELY taken drugs out of his life. Sadly for him, Reino came along, sweeping my mother off her feet, and there's no way that she'll ever go back to him. However, Scott was my personal favorite out of all of the guys that she dated. I sometimes wonder about what it would be like to have Scott as my step dad...

I have had maroon 5 with me ever since..it's like part of the stepfather that I never had. I love scott. He's possibly the greatest man that I, personally, have ever met.

Song of the day: better that we break by maroon 5.

Shoutout of the day:
scott: as I said before, you're amazing and I love you. Thank you for all that you've done and sacrificed for my mother.

Q&A Session! ~2.

Guess what everybody!! 925 pageviews!! Okay, so I've been getting a lot of questions lately about Dawson..and so I decided to do a little bit of what I call...lol..Q&A Time!! If any of you guys have questions, comment it up on either my facebook page, or any of my blog posts about what you guys would like to know! Okay, here we go!

How come he never texted you?!
His siblings hide his phone from him. -_-


What happened at Julia's Movie Night?
Oh yeah..that's right! I never talked about that! Okay, so I went and while I was in the car, Reino set up a Wi-Fi Hotspot and so I just facebook messaged him because I couldn't text him. (refer to question 1.) Anyways, I was trying to get him a ride so that he could come, and then all of a sudden, he said that he could! and then he came, and then we decided to watch Yes Man with Jim Carrey. Like..the whole movie we kept staring at each other like idiots, hahaha. It was really fun because I actually felt like we weren't such an awkward couple anymore. I kept resting my head on his shoulder, and it didn't seem like he was uncomfortable at all. (unlike the previous movie night that I had with him.) We kissed like 3 times at the movie night. It was fun. Loved it! The only down side is that his brothers got a hold of his phone after the party, and hid it so now I can't talk to him (except FACEBOOK!)

Did Dawson ever say he was sorry for standing you up that one day?
Haha yes.. He actually told me he was sick and stuff, so I was kind of relieved he didn't come. I'd probably feel bad if he did come, I guess I was just worried about him.

You guys are a cute couple..How long have you guys been together?
Well, tomorrow, it will be 4 months..haha that's like..a third of an entire year!

Is this your longest relationship?
Not yet! hahaha My longest relationship just happens to be FIVE months..exactly. So, if he and I could make it to 5 months and a day, then it'll be a record. XD

Why do you feel stupid when you talk about him?
Hmm..that's a really good question. I think it's because I know he never talks about me or anything, and because I feel like I'm being super obsessive over him, and he knows it. So this Q&A session is kinda makin' me nervous, but anything for the fans, right?

Do you two fight a lot?
Now that I think about it...I think that we've only fought like...6 times. When we do fight, it's about something really really stupid, and then we both regret it. It's a really good thing that our fights don't last long..we both hate it.. a lot!

Your longest kiss with him?
Oh my heck..I don't count! But apparently Chelsea does! In one blog post, she was talking about how he and I have the "longest" kisses... O_o

Did you set up this blog JUST to talk about him?
Pfft! NO!! I talk about other stuff too! It's just that..well..Dawson is a big part of my life and all, and I guess if you don't wanna read about that kinda stuff then you should quit reading my blog! I set up this blog to be open about my opinion on certain things, even if it involves him! I guess it is kinda funny you'd think that though.

Yep! Okay that concludes our "Dawson" Q&A session!

SongOfTheDay: Love You Forever by Ryan Huston

ShoutOutOfTheDay:
The Hub: Just to let you know! I loved the new MLP episode! I'm pretty sure that you don't read my blog, but I love LPS as well as MLP..You better not be canceling MLP, you make tons of money off of your fans, and we love you guys!
James Facer: Thank you SOO much for letting me be your "Co-Admin" to The Daily Tower! It means a ton to me, and I'm glad to still be in your life, and not be mortal enemies with you! Thanks for everything, and PLEASE be able to blog still, don't make me start to worry about you and your posting. XD You, my friend, are one of the best bloggers that I know, keep doing what you do best. Never give up.
Chelsea Moore: Hey girl, you really are my best friend, and that post you posted on Facebook the other day, was really amazing, and it made me really happy, and I was having kind of a crappy day. Here's to Chelbo! Picking people up when they most need it, or when they don't need it at all! I LAHHVE you!

THANK YOU ALL, VIEWERS! IT'S THANKS TO YOU THAT AS OF TODAY, (this morning) I HAVE 925 PAGEVIEWS! I LOVE YOU GUYS! THANK YOU! XXoXoOOxxo

He Doesn't Know...

I have to admit..sometimes I feel as if he knows nothing about me, and that he likes me for my intelligence and my "good looks" and that I'm fun to be around...Well...there's more to me than just that. I mean..he can't even tell what my mood is in person. Which makes me wonder why I put up with it...and truth is, I don't really know...but right now it makes me mad. I was pretty dang depressed today, and the only person that actually tried and accomplished helping me was Keely Keele! I feel like she's the only one that will listen without saying that their life is worse or that I need to get over it because "life sucks, and then you die." I mean...I don't really get it...Why can't he understand when I'm sad? I even drew a broken heart on my Science notebook..(and yes, I know he saw it) he was completely clueless. It seems like to me that whenever I'm depressed, he has to be even more depressed, and then I have to get him to cheer up so that he can get me to cheer up, this is the plan that never ever works. It's strange though...he says he can tell what my emotion is over text messaging or things like that, but he can't tell it in person.

All my friends say "Bek, you tell us a lot about your life, everyday!" Well guess what! I tell you about the SMALLER problems I have that aren't all that personal, and that I feel comfortable talking to you guys about! There's a ton of problems that I have that you guys don't know about. Plus, I would tell you more about my life, but I don't know how to do that without any of you guys calling me selfish or conceited.

My mp3 keeps freezing, and I don't know what to do...To be honest, I really need to take it to Best Buy to figure out what the fetch is wrong with it...

SongOfTheDay: Nothing Lasts Forever by Maroon 5

ShoutOutOfTheDay:

Keely Keele: I love you..thanks a lot for listening to my problems, unlike Braxton who kept interrupting our "heart-to-heart" conversation on the bus. 

Anyways.. =/ Thanks for being my fans, and thanks to those people who are my daily viewers. I love you guys, and writing about this has made me a little bit better. Thanks for reading.

KISSING CHALLENGE..?

Math: today, we learned about Ummmm...radius and diameter. It was pretty dang boring, I'm not gonna lie.
Technology: I started FANGIRLING about my neww sister site, The Daily Tower
Choir: hyper, and HAPPY to sing.
Science: got a little bit Behind on a Lab assignment we did.
English: since I did my work yesterday, I just finished my works cited page and then helped other students with Mrs. Baker.
Afterschool: hung out with Dawson and we kissed for the THIRTIETH time today!

Now for the stuff I wanna talk about! My new sister site, The Daily Tower, challenged me to KEEP TRACK of all my kisses (total) up until I turn 18! That'll take some work. Haha anyways! My four month anniversary is in like...5 days! =) so excited because I'll get to say him and I have been together for a third of a year. =)

Song of The Day: Intuition by Selena Gomez

Shout out of the Day:
Krista Philips: oh my heck! I'm so THRILLED that you're a daily reader. Love you. <3 ^^

Love you guys! Don't forget to like my facebook page. ^^ <3

Cover Photos!

I have a problem, I have to confess...about an attraction that I can't repress. I'm totally taken, and often times shaken, please somebody help me..I'm IN..GREAT...DISTRESS! My cousin from New york has it, and it's in my blood too. It's my passion, my favorite, it's all that I do. So now I have to do it, and just take a LEAP... I know what I'll be...I'll know what I'll dooo!!! (all that was in song btw... haha XD)

I have a passion..a talent..a gift..a..a..well..you get the point! =) I, LiL MiSS EPiC, am a GRAPHIC DESIGNER! I'd like to start calling pianoman117.blogspot.com my sister site, but it's not...it's like...my partner in crime site..haha XD Anyways! For my partner in crime, I decided to help him out a bit with his blog. I made him a cover photo for his facebook page!!

I made this cover photo for:
pianoman117.blogspot.com and for
http://www.facebook.com/pianoman117?fref=ts

He loved it! I was sooo happy! I worked on it for around 10 minutes..I could've finished faster but umm...I had to get suggestions and see if he liked it through the process and stuff. I had to find out what he wanted on it, and I actually had him change the name from "A Glimpse of Day to Day Life for the Gentle Giant of Rigby" to "The Daily Tower." It all works out, and looks good, am I right? =)

http://www.facebook.com/inspiringmyinspirations?fref=ts
and for lilmissepic.blogspot.com...this post i guess. =)

Anyways! I've been thinking..It's been since NOVEMBER since I updated my blog's look and it's been a while since I made my Facebook cover photo..SO! I decided to update this blog's look! Like the clouds? =) Yeah..I absolutely love blue..but I couldn't just change the stripe's color or anything..it looked too much of a subtle change...I had to change it more than just that! So yeah that's what I did! And here is our new OFFICIAL LiL MiSS EPiC Cover Photo! Hope you guys like!

ShoutOutofTheDay:
James Facer: Hey James! It's been a while since I've left you a shout-out but here you go! I was kinda wondering if you'd let me be your sister-site or something like that! I could figure out a way to link your blog to mine-but your site is your own and so is mine..We're just like...sibling-sites. something like that! haha =) Anyways! Think about it, and message me when you can! Hmm..i like the sound of it! The Daily Tower and LiL MiSS EPiC come together as siblings! ^_^ Pretty awesome!

SongOfTheDay: Defying Gravity by The Glee Cast



ANYWAYS! I love you guys! Let's try hard to pull off a great year, and get more likes on my facebook page @ http://www.facebook.com/inspiringmyinspirations?fref=ts

Elbows!!!

Okay. Today was NOT too bad! Gave some friends cookiedough. (Of course. ^^) and so far, everybody is loving it. =) BTW! I'm maintaining a perfect 4.0 for my grade average. =) Yay!
Math: Ugh. SUPER boring...we went to the lab did some computer work. Braxton and I are racing to be ahead.. yeah. I'm winning. =) when we went back to the class, we took a pretest on area and perimeter..only ones I knew was rectangles, squares, triangles, and Pentagons..everything else was like: huh? So today was confusing in Math.
Technology: Not much to talk about...other than me going on Bing and looking up what the popular posts are for the day. Haha one of em was women on fire yesterday, but today it was Emma Watson and this old host. Can't remember his name. Haha
Choir: absolutely terrific! I love Mary. The whole class we were communicating with each other from across the room. =) giggling like idiots half the time. Haha
Science: Me, Dawson, Ryan, Bethany, and Cody all did this thing with the length of ten meters and we had to see how many meters per second we could all go. Only one I remember was Dawson went 4 m/s. =) because he's epic that way. I didn't notice until today, but Dawson jumps when he runs...so I guess it's like speed skipping with a distance.
English: doing this research paper on Henry the Eighth...getting a bit behind. We're supposed to have forty cards, and Dawson has twenty-something and I don’t even have ten...sometimes I wonder how he managed to pull that off..especially because I seemed more concentrated than him.
Kay.. so Dawson and I were standing around and then Isaiah, Marcus, and Chris all come up and start to talk to us. Isaiah started talking about something dirty and I was finally like: Eww. Okay. I'm gonna walk away now...*realizes she's holding hands with Dawson* and Dawson is coming with me. So I walk away with him and is just me and him and none of our friends and then I realize that when we hold hands he has to Bend his elbow. (Because he's short and I'm tall) I thought to myself: hey. What if I bent MY elbow? And so Dawson and I kept switching it and it looked weird when my elbow was Bent. Haha...anyways. the gate opened and he walked me to it, and then we hugged and then kissed. =) and I walk away realizing..that was the 20th! Yay! ^^
Anyways! That's a recap of my day. Hope you guys enjoyed. =)

Song of The Day: Come On Get Higher by Matt Nathanson.
Shout Out of the Day:
Braxton: Kay..idk if you even read my blog, but you are so awesome! Thanks for putting up with me and listening to my daily drama.

The Key to Understanding

Okay. So I'm sick in bed still...and well...I kinda wanted to vent my emotions about my very close friends who broke up recently to you guys.

If you're in a relationship, and you feel it's too much for you at the time, then yeah...I think it's right for you to break up with the other person. However, by telling the other person that you are done being with them, but you still care can be the wrong thing to do. Instead of doing something drastic, I think if I were in that situation, I would've told the other person that: One. I can't handle a relationship right now. And, Two. I still want to be friends, and I still care about you. If you put lots of thought into a situation like this, then I think after it happens, you'll know what to do. Anyways, if I was the person being broken up with, I'd probably be miserable too..but only because I couldn't understand... The key to understanding is putting yourself in someone else's shoes.

Okay. Right now, I'm not trying to tell you what to do, I'm only venting and giving my advice at the same time, so please don't get the wrong idea...I love you all, and I wouldn't want to seem as if whoever reads this blog has to follow me or whatever.

Okay...so I actually figured something out recently. It kind of links to my life last year, and I think it's fairly interesting...

The way he used to look at me...the look like he truly cares, the look in his eyes. I see that same look again, but in a completely different person. I never thought it was possible... to get this person to love me back... but he does...and it's so weird...I can feel myself looking at him the way the other guy did... I can't really comprehend all my feelings, but all I know is that I feel amazing when its just him and me. Or even when I get lost in his eyes.

Anyways...yeah that's honestly how I feel up to this point. Just thought I'd share a bit of my understanding with you guys.

Song of The Day: Bubbly by Colbie Caillat
(With a little shout out: Sunshine, I really want you to know I care about you a ton. <3 you know who you are. Iloveyou.)

Shout Out of The Day:
Austin(Bob)Myers: I try my best to understand and to help. Just know that I'm here for you, and I'll try to give advice the best that I possibly can. I love you!

Sudden Reverse

Hello world! Okay! I just downloaded an app called Blogger. Lovin' it. I'm using my MP3 to post, and you know what that means! MORE POSTS! However, it'll be a bit harder to get emphasis on here..so I prefer the computer especially because I can actually TYPE. Also...I can't really get color on here...so I guess you guys will know what I'm using. No color=MP3 which kinda sucks..but I guess its alright. Also...cant rearrange pictures so no pictures either. =(

Some of you guys up at Rigby junior High are probably wondering why I didn't go to school. Well there comes a time in everybodys life where you get super dizzy, super tired, and super out of it...so I decided to take a break today..kick back and relax...after all, I've been super stressed lately...with school that is. Turns out I've got a B+ in my English class. It's really bothering me because I feel the need to get straight A's..and thats what I got last trimester, but this trimester has been SO much different... I'm relatively good at Algebra, but I have trouble with Geometry...and in Science I'm getting confused easier...good thing I've got Dawson and my friend Bethany to help me out there... still...its like life has suddenly reversed on me...all my strengths are becoming weaknesses... it makes me wonder "maybe I'm sick because I'm stressed."  Oh well I guess...life does go on.

Song of the Day: 1000 years by Christina Perri
This song just has a lot of memories attached to it...lately I've hated this song because of that...but now I love it..knowing that I've come so far and that that song has been involved with my life is pretty dang amazing...so I've learned to be thankful for all the music in my life.

Shout out of the day:
Mary Landon: I'm so grateful to have you as a friend. Thanks for the chocolate..and FYI, that's not what got me sick. Girl, you are amazing. I love you more than you think I do. <3 Keep being silly, and keep being you. Everyone loves it.

Okidokiloki! Thanks for reading my blog, and once again please don't forget to like my facebook page: Lil Miss Epic. BTW. I labeled it as a book.  Thanks you guys! Peace out!

New Year's Eve Pictures!

Hey guys! I know it's been like...forever since I've posted! I've been SOOO busy lately. you know...with my end of the world party, and my step siblings coming over for the holidays... It's a little hard...with all the drama and crap going on in my life. With the new year, I feel like all my old problems are starting to go away, but I'm getting new problems instead. For instance, lately, me and Dawson have been fighting about really really REALLY stupid things. So stupid, that I can't even remember what any of the fights have been about. I just know that we both feel terrible after we do fight, and then we just try to move on from it, and go back to our daily routine..but I can't help but have the memories of the fights in my head...and how I wouldn't reply back, and we'd sit there and just think to ourselves "Ahh...can't we just end this already?" (by end it...i mean end fighting...it's like we're gonna commit suicide or break up...) Other than the fights, Dawson and I have been doing great. We started using nicknames and stuff like that... =) it's fun, and it makes me feel better about myself...in a way! hahaha Anyways...Yesterday we took family photos, but I took the liberty to take some by myself...so I took about 16 pictures of myself the other day...that's how beautiful I was...hahaha just kidding..My sister was prettier..she looked like a model. Here...Have some of the edits I did, and took...but also..have one of me and my brother. <3

This is me and my brother, Erik, who is leaving on his mission
March 13, 2013. I'm going to miss him so so much.

Absolute FAVORTIE picture of 2012...I love this...and
you guys can totally see why..I just..I look..AMAZING.
Do I always look this good? hahaa...in my mind:
Absolutely not.

Dawson said this was his favorite picture that
I sent him yesterday...I like it too, but you
already know that I like the previous
picture wayyy better.

This is me and my stepsister, Sarah. Sarah is actually the one
who figured out how to wave my hair in the first place, she
just french braided it after I had taken a shower. =) I have to
say that she did a MARVELOUS job. I love it.

For those of you who have NO clue what's happening
in this one...Sarah is just finishing the sign language
mime for "beautiful" so i just took a picture while she
kept her hand there.

We love Nerdglasses. haha =)

Took this as soon as she was done with her makeup.
Turned out great, huh?

It was so beautiful when I got home from
family pictures..so I decided to go outside
and enjoy Winter while it lasted...plus it
was beautiful while i was out there, so
I took pictures. =)

This is my backyard.

It actually wasn't all that cold outside
in the evening.

Kinda posted some of these pictures out of
order, but it won't let me rearrange them, so
this is actually the first picture I took
New Year's Eve.

This is me and my stepbrother, Adam..He's
grown so much! He used to be way shorter
than me...but not anymore! See the height
difference?

Well.. he loves to photobomb, let's just put it that way.

Not one of my favorites, but I thought I'd
experiment a little bit with softness on the
pictures.

We're nerds. It's true. =)

I took this picture because I was trying to
apologize to my boyfriend, because I
had thought I did something wrong, and
I later found out that it wasn't my fault at all.

My favorite picture of me and Sarah...it just looks
so calm and serene. I love it. =)

Okay! Now it's that time of day where we do the daily stuff that we do! hahaha =) You know what that means...probably...maybe not! oh well!

Song of The Day: Glad You Came by The Wanted
I chose this song because it won #1 song on the countdown on the radio. (Z103) We counted down from 103, and got to number one and this was it! I actually sat down and thought about it..People come from everywhere to America to try and accomplish their dreams...Well, it sure looks like The Wanted did what they "wanted" to do! =) Congratulations to them. =) Same with One Direction, because they're cool. =)

SPECIAL SHOUT OUT OF THE DAY:
People of the world! I have big big BIG news! Okay...some of you may have figured this out already..but I have a page on Facebook that needs some likes, and I was wondering if THE PEOPLE OF FACEBOOK could go to my page...It is called Lil Miss Epic. (As my blog is named obviously) GO there! and clickith the LIKE button. PLEEEEEAAASE?! At this point I'm desperate! I've had the page up since December 16th, and the only one who's liked it is CHELSEA MOORE! and I kinda...commanded her to do that...I think you guys get it! If you like my blog, and want to hear more from me, I think it's best if you like that page...because I put up Songs of the Day and Shoutouts, and how many pageviews i have, and I post pictures, and I'm TRYING hard to do a song of the day everyday on my page..=)

ANYWAYS!
Thank you all so much for reading my blog! it means a lot to me! Until next time, and the time after that i guess...PEACE OUT.